Freitag, 30. November 2007

Oh nö, nicht schon wieder!

Wer hat's Forum kaputtgemacht??? Na, wer wars? :suspekt:

Anyway... Stargate Atlantis läuft. Shiny, ich habe Beschäftigung.

Dienstag, 27. November 2007

I wish I had a river...

I just realized I'll spend yet another Christmas alone this year... How sad is that.

Sonntag, 25. November 2007

Jack Maggs by Peter Carey

Jack Maggs is a novel by Peter Carey that is roughly addressing Great Expectations. It focuses on the story of the convict Jack Maggs searching for Henry Phipps, a boy who gave him food when he was on the way to the prison ship headed for Australia. The book follows several characters an plotlines. There is Maggs own story, written by him for Henry to read. There is the story of the other inmates of the house Maggs ends up in as a footman to bide his time until Phipps returns. He meets Mercy, a servant girl, whose story swings from sad to heroic to pathetic. And there is the story of Tobias Oates and his family, who keenly resemble Charles Dickens and his family. So in a way it is the story about what might have inspired an author like Dickens to write a story like Great Expectations, which persons might have influenced him and so on.

The book is a good read because of these different intertwined plotlines. I guess if I had known Great Expectations and a bit more about Dickens' life even more details would have been familiar to me. But I found the second part a little long, and the ending (a postcolonial moralizing) a bit too artificial. So it's 6 of 10 magnets.

Ouch. AGAIN!!!

Today, we add physical pain to the usual stuff. Ouch, my feet. Ouch, my back. Ouch, ouch, ouch. Ushering people really can be exhausting. But the more you move, the better you are. So I'll stop whining now and just go and take a nice hot shower.

BTW, the icon --- I used my photoshop. Well, just to size it down so I can use it on the forum. So again, not my work. Anyway I picked it, because that was the look I gave one of the Blue Men last night, and he responded with exactly the same look. Just without the smile. (Not to mention David Tennant looking absolutely gogeus in that pic. *fangirl*) But the way he approached me then coming up the stairs in strobe light reminded me extremely of "Blink". It felt like I was blinking, only that the lights just went out for a second, and when they turned up again, menacing Blue Man was closer. I actually took a step back. I just couldn't figure out until just now of what it reminded me.

Samstag, 24. November 2007

Ouch.

I haven't been writing for a while but there is not that much to say anyway. I'm not in the best mood at the moment in general; everything around here just seems to be grey and dark, and as much as I try to see the nice things and feel comfy, I just fail most of the time.

I'm also extremely busy and still behind with my work which I find a bit annoying. It's adding to the stress and as a reason I have the stress symptoms coming back. It's in a way very much of a daily struggle to deal with it all right now. But I'm doing what I can.

Well, I guess everyone's just very tired once in a while.

Samstag, 17. November 2007

I want my Photoshop!!!

I'm just waiting for my computer to finish something and I was in the mood for a new visual representation after the Doomsday look consisting of these:

Today I didn't have anything to do, so I went on reading Great Expectations, which is fastly becoming one of my favourite books, and downloaded a thousand pictures. I thought, well let's make a new sig and ava. And then I realized: I have no Photoshop on the computer. I just haven't got around installing it yet. (During the last six month. Yeah, I now. Remember the soap dispenser?) But now I really wanted the new sig, so I decided to try Paint. OMG. I so want my photoshop. Cutting the picture was not that difficult. But there is no sizing tool. At least not a proper one. I had to calculate percentages. And manually adjust the frame size. No lovely colour grading, no brushes... hell, I'm no expert using photoshop, but it does make (fangirl-)life a lot easier. After the new sig I was too exhausted for a new ava, so I'll be using one that I snatched for while. Until I sit in front of the other computer and have time to make my own.

BTW, taking your dog for a walk and stamp through the mud is just brilliant. The air is so clear here, the trees are just always beautiful... I just want to buy me some old farmhouse around here and want to become the strange lady that lives outside the village and that children are afraid of.

Mittwoch, 14. November 2007

Excellent!

Ich habe gerade einen recht... speziellen Brief von der Uni bekommen. Der Dekan möchte mir gerne mein Zeugnis überreichen. Der Dekan. Wahhhhh! :imKreisrenn: war die erste Reaktion. Die zweite: ich zieh was Schickes an. :mehdchen: Die dritte: was, bin ich die Erste? Das ist mir suspekt. Und jetzt frage ich mich, wer da mehr Glückwünsche bekommt, ich oder der Dekan. Ist schließlich mein Abschluss. Da möchte ich auch mal im Mittelpunkt stehen.

Ganz ehrlich, ich hatte schon mit so etwas ähnlichem gerechnet. Ich bin eine der relativ wenigen, die den BA tatsächlich in sechs Semestern geschafft hat, und ich hab nebenher auch noch gearbeitet. Da kann man ruhig stolz sein. Ich finde, ich hab auch mal eine ordentliche Zeugnisübergabe verdient. Vielleicht kommt dann endlich mal der Moment, an dem ich stolz darauf sein kann, dass ich tatsächlich was geleistet habe.

BTW: Auf dem Brief stand oben was von Exzellenz-Uni drauf, weil wir uns das ja jetzt schimpfen können. Dann meine Anschrift: Herr Purslane Willis. Ick bin immer noch weiblich und heiße Will. Wehe die haben mein Zeugnis falsch ausgestellt, dann jibts Backpfeifen.

Dienstag, 13. November 2007

Die Freuden der Stellenanzeigen

Jetzt muss ich meinen Frust schon im Blog loswerden, weil das Forum immer noch nicht geht. Was ich schon immer mal sagen wollte: ich hasse Stellenanzeigen. Ich hasse sie abgrundtief. Nun ist es nicht so, dass ich unbedingt einen Job finden muss, zumindest nicht in den nächsten paar Stunden. Ich habe einen Job, und so sehr ich auch am letzten Wochenende geflucht habe, ich mag diesen Job. Gerade das Gäste-Vollquatschen gefällt mir, und dass man tatsächlich Sachen verkauft, die die Leute auch wollen. Deswegen sind sämtliche Call-Center-Jobs bei mir schonmal raus. Da geh ich lieber putzen. Aber wir reden hier ja von Studentenjobs, und damit bin ich relativ gut versorgt.

Der Grund, warum ich mich durch Stellenanzeigen wühle, ist, dass ich immer noch keine Idee habe, was ich denn nach dem Studium machen möchte. Ich kann Englisch sprechen, übersetzen, und ich kann ganz gut denken. Lesen, schreiben und atmen zähle ich jetzt mal nicht als besondere Fähigkeiten auf. Dummerweise wird nach diesen Fähigkeiten nicht gerade gesucht. Nach ungefähr drei Seiten wünschte ich mir, ich hätte was anständiges gelernt oder doch auf Lehramt studiert. Hab ich aber nicht, und jetzt ist es auch ein bisschen spät um daran noch etwas zu ändern. Und ich sollte erwähnen, dass meine Mutter in so ziemlich jedem Telefonat meint: "Ich dachte, du könntest doch im Verlach arbeiten." Ja, Mama, das denken ne Menge andere Studenten in dieser Stadt auch. Und ob ich im Verlag arbeiten will, steht auch nochmal auf einem ganz anderen Blatt.

Und das führt dann wieder zu der Grundsatzdiskussion, die jedesmal kommt, wenn man mich fragt, was ich denn nach dem Studium machen will. Als ich angefangen habe Englisch und Film zu studieren, wurde ich gefragt, warum. Ich sagte, weil es Spaß macht, und bekam die prompte Antwort: "Um Spaß geht es aber nicht beim Arbeiten." Da stellt sich mir automatisch die Frage: ja warum eigentlich nicht, verdammte Axt??? Ich verkaufe 40 Stunden meines Lebens in der Woche, das einzige Gut, dass ich wirklich besitze, und über das ich verfügen kann, und dann darf ich nichtmal Spaß dran haben? (Ja, ich bin idealistisch veranlagt, und ja, ich weiß auch, dass nicht jeder Job immer Spaß machen kann. Ich arbeite schließlich auch schon ein Weilchen.) Bei mir steht der Spaßfaktor mit dem Verdienstfaktor so ziemlich auf einer Stufe. Wenn der Job keinen Spaß macht, dann weiß ich, dass ich das nicht lange aushalte, und zwar aus dem Grund, dass ich einfach nicht will. Wenn ich nicht will, hab ich keinen Erfolg, ergo noch weniger Spaß, und irgendwann schmeiß ich dann hin. Alles verdammt verzwickt in der Arbeitswelt.

Trotz aller Frustration, wenn es um die Jobsuche nach dem Studium geht, muss ich allerdings eins sagen: ich habe ein unerschütterliches Vertrauen darin, dass ich schon was finden werde. Ich weiß nicht so recht, wo das herkommt, aber irgendwas wird sich schon ergeben. Ich bin schließlich nicht komplett auf den Kopf gefallen. Nur was, nur was? Naja. Grübeln bringt da jetzt sowieso so gut wie gar nichts. Außerdem sollte ich eh gerade einen Text lesen, was ich hiermit tue.

Oh! Ich bin ein Murmeltier!

Äh, guten Morgen auch. Ich glaube, ich mutiere gerade zu irgendwas, das Winterschlaf hält. Ich könnte sogar noch weiterschlafen. Jetzt aber zum wichtigsten Punkt: wer hat das Forum kaputtgemacht? Na? Naaa? Mäh, schon wieder Kommunikationsmangel. Und nein, ich bin dann nicht produktiver, weil ich dann mit der F5-Taste beschäftigt bin.

Okay. Geh ich halt was anderes machen.

EDIT: Sehr witzig. In sämtlichen Userblog heißt es: Ohnoes!!!!1einself. Mjaahh. Und wenn die Musik im Radio nicht so toll wäre, würde ich schon längst unter der Dusche stehen.

Uhhh, Stealers Wheel! *tanz*

Montag, 12. November 2007

What?!

Das Forum ist immer noch kaputt und die User sind dazu übergegangen, über ihre Blogs miteinander zu kommunizieren. Nunja, wenigstens kommunizieren wir. Und ich habe Gelegenheit den Text fürs Seminar nachher zu lesen, den ich natürlich nicht geschafft habe, weil ich 20 Stunden gearbeitet habe in den letzten zwei Tagen.

Boah, ich brauch Kaffee.

EDIT: Ich frage mich, was Ranwen wohl gerade treibt. Ich erinnere mich an den Bericht des letzten dreitägigen Forumsausfalls.

:F5:

Just for once I want to work with professionals.

As the forum still doesn't work, I'll have to rant about my workday here. First of all: how the hell did I get myself to do that every freaking weekend? The only thing youd o in that theatre is standing. All the time, with hardly a break for 9 hours. During the frist show I had the feeling my feet started to gnaw off my toes. During the interval of the second show I had the feeling they were done with the toes and started to work up their way to my knees. The guests were really strange today to. But Sunday audiences tend to be.

And just for once I want to do the math afterwords and have no money missing, nothing calculated wrong and everything just alright. I mean the prices are a bit weird, and after nine hours it is kinda hard to calculate everything in your head, but it just would be nice to know whether there is a minus because you did something wrong, your collegue did something wrong, or the person messed up completely the day before, which was the cause today, and made me stay about an hour longer, because we just couldn't reconstruct what the hell that person thought about yesterday. Probably about the drink after work. I'm back in that theatre next Monday (Weekend Home with capital letters!) and let's see how things work out then. If I have the shop that is.

Ouch, my feet. At least the rash on my face that I got yesterday at the other theatre look much better today.

Sonntag, 11. November 2007

What's this?!

First of all, why is the forum down? Not funny. I wanted to share my astonishment with them. I just got up (I'm still horribly tired), walked over to the window, pushed the curtain aside and managed a very distinguished "Whoah! What the fuck???" at the snow that has been falling during the last eight hours. There was no sign of that last night when I walked home.

The funny thing is, I ranted last night on the forum, that I want to have winter and cold and snow. I'm amazed somebody apparently listened to that.

Freitag, 9. November 2007

The dying of the light...

Halleluja, choir of angels and trumpet flourish! We got back our internet access yesterday, just in time for my day off. So I just spent the last two hours watching David Tennant's Video Diary from Series 3 of Doctor Who, and I enjoyed that very much, and now I will do something useful and read my texts for class on Monday. If I don't fall asleep again. My good mood just crumbled away though. No particular reason for that... okay, music from Ally McBeal is not really the cheeriest thing to listen too.

I tried to be a bit productive at least, but to be honest today is my weekend. I'll have to work 20 hours during the next two days, so I kind of want to spend today doing some nice things. And if I feel melancholy I just want to revel in it for a while, sit in a room lit by candles and stare out of the window into the storm.

Donnerstag, 8. November 2007

Cut off from civilization.

So here we go again. Flatmate didn't/forgot to/didn't want to/didn't care to pay the damn telephone bill, and we're cut off from the internet again, one of the two things that keep me insane in this strange place. (The other is my vivid imagination, something that you simply can't cut me off from, no matter how hard you try.) With a bit of luck I'll be back online at the beginning of next week. And now excuse me please, I have to go to class.

Dienstag, 6. November 2007

Schweinkram?!

Wenn in einem Theater zwei Leute eine knappe Stunde nebeneinander stehen und nur ab und zu einen Gast befriedigen abfertigen müssen, dann redet man über die seltsamsten Dinge. Irgendwie bin ich mit meiner Kollegin auf das Thema Pornos gekommen. Weswegen ich hiermit auf Oriens Beitrag zum Thema Porno verweise, und mal eben die Liste der Titel von Pornofilmen kopiere, weil sie mir heute mehrfach Lachanfälle beschert hat:

  • "Aladin und die Wunderschlampe"
  • "Bens Huren"
  • "Eiskalte Schwengel"
  • "Hairy Potter und die Kammer des Schleckens"
  • "Schwanz der Vampire"
  • "Arielle, die Nicht-mehr-Jungfrau"
  • "Auf der Liege der außergewöhnlichen Gentlemen"
  • "Black Cock Down"
  • "Gaylien - Directors Fuck"
  • "In Diana Jones"
  • "iPop"
  • "The Gay after Tomorrow"

Besonders Hairy Potter löst irgendwas zwischen hemmungslosem Staunen und hemmungslosem Lachen aus. Meine Kollegin sponn dann mögliche Titel mal weiter. Schneeflittchen und die sieben Zipfel liegt ja relativ nah, aber Dornmöschen (copyright S.) war mein persönliches Highlight. Alleine der Titel inspiriert schon. :ugly:

(Und nein, ich arbeite nicht bei Schw Tanz der Vampire. S. schon.)

Montag, 5. November 2007

Home!

Just the right feeling to start into a Monday but: I want to go home. I miss my Mom's cooking and I feel half starved. I want to take a walk through the forest, but another layer of mud on my once-yellow chucks and cuddle my dog. I want to have trees around me. Apart from that I have a kind of hellish week ahead with no weekend whatsoever because I work both Saturday and Sunday for ten hours each day.

Then I hardly slept at all last night. I mean it's my own fault in a way because I actually did not do very much during the day, so I wasn't tired, and I didn't eat enough, so I was hungry, and at four in the morning I was kinda bursting with energy and still awake. I guess I also got a bit overexcited because we planned the trip to Stratford it bit further last night. Until the online ticket service of the RSC crashed. It's not my fault, I swear.

Anyway, I'm looking ahead to a dreadful Monday. I should buy some bananas before I go to class. Which means I should get up, take a shower and get dressed.

Sonntag, 4. November 2007

I'm a dreamy idealist. Not that I didn't know.

Test from here. I should mention I like tests but I haven't found one yet that fits as well as this one does.

Dreamy Idealist (DI)


The dreamy idealist is very cautious and therefore often appears shy and reserved to others. He shares his rich emotional life and his passionate convictions with very few people. But one would be very much mistaken to judge him to be cool and reserved. He has a pronounced inner system of values and clear, honourable principles for which he is willing to sacrifice a great deal. Johanna von Orleans or Sir Galahad would have been good examples of this personality type. He is always at great pains to improve the world. He can be very considerate towards others and does a lot to support them and stand up for them. He is interested in his fellow beings, attentive and generous towards them. Once his enthusiasm for an issue or person is aroused, he can become a tireless fighter.

For the dreamy idealist, practical things are not really so important. He only busies himself with mundane everyday demands when absolutely necessary. He tends to live according to the motto “the genius controls the chaos” - which is normally the case so that he often has a very successful academic career. He is less interested in details; he prefers to look at something as a whole. This means that he still has a good overview even when things start to become hectic. However, as a result, it can occasionally happen that he overlooks something important. As he is very peace-loving, he tends not to openly show his dissatisfaction or annoyance but to bottle it up. Assertiveness is not one of his strong points; he hates conflicts and competition. He prefers to motivate others with his amicable and enthusiastic nature. Whoever has him as superior will never have to complain about not being given enough praise.

As at work, the dreamy idealist is a helpful and loyal friend and partner, a person of integrity. Obligations are absolutely sacred to him. The feelings of other are important to him and he loves making other people happy. He is satisfied with just a small circle of friends; his need for social contact is not very marked as he also needs a lot of time to himself. Superfluous small talk is not his thing. If one wishes to be friends with him or have a relationship with him, one would have to share his world of thought and be willing to participate in profound discussions. If you manage that you will be rewarded with an exceptionally intensive, rich partnership. Due to his high demands on himself and others, this personality type tends however to sometimes overload the relationship with romantic and idealistic ideas to such an extent that the partner feels overtaxed or inferior. The dreamy idealist does not fall in love head over heels but when he does fall in love he wants his to be a great, eternal love.

Adjectives which describe your type

introverted, theoretical, emotional, spontaneous, idealistic, dreamy, effusive, pleasant, reserved, friendly, passionate, loyal, perfectionist, helpful, creative, composed, curious, obstinate, with integrity, willing to make sacrifices, romantic, cautious, shy, peace-loving, vulnerable, sensitive, communicative, imaginative

These subjects could interest you

literature, philosophy, psychology, music, art (museums), writing, drawing/painting, astrology, spiritual things, meditation, handicrafts, writing, voluntary work

Freitag, 2. November 2007

Out of Sight, director: Stephen Soderbergh

Out of Sight is the story of Jack Foley, bank robber, who escapes from prison and tries to pull off a last coup. It is also an elegant love story that can't have a happy ending. On his flight Jack ends up in the trunk of a car with Karen Sisco, a federal marshal, with whom he falls in love. She, being drawn to him as well, follows him from Florida to Detroit where she finally has to decide what's more important: love or law.

It's hard for me to write anything bad about this film as it is one of my favourite films ever. I'm not a big fan of Jennifer Lopez but in this film she is brilliantly cast as tough Karen Sisco. I have to admit that I remember watching that film in the cinema almost ten years ago, and when George Clooney took of his shirt I just sat pinned in my chair, my jaw dropped open and I gasped. I guess Clooney is responsible for my sexual awakening. I love the story about this love that is just bound to be painful. The film is full of strange characters such as Steve Zahn as slightly dumb accomplice during the flight, or Dennis Farina as Sisco's dad asking Karen's boyfriend, who is married to someone else, questions about adulterous behaviour. It also has a lot of bizarre moments including one of the robbers shooting himself in the head because he trips on the stairs.

But the whole magic of this films comes together for me in the sequence when Karen and Jack meet at the hotel bar in Detroit and pretend to be Gary and Celeste. Everything in this sequence is just perfect, the music, the lighting, the way the dialogue is intercut with what follows after in the hotel room. There is a beautiful sensuality about the whole sequence, and the following quote is for me the outstanding moment of the film:

"It's like seeing a person you never saw before -- you could be passing on the street -- you look at each other and for a few seconds, there's a kind of recognition. Like you both know something. But then the next moment the person's gone, and it's too late to do anything about it, but you remember it because it was right there and you let it go, and you think, "What if I had stopped and said something?" It might happen only a few times in your life."
If you've had such a moment only once in your life you can't ignore the truth of that.

So, 10 out of 10 rough diamonds.

Credit? Bitch, please.

Surfing through icon communities and snatching bits here and there I just remembered I wanted to blog about the crediting madness that goes on there. Just to make it clear, most of the icons that I use here were not created by me. The one in the Angels and Insects post is the only exception so far, and if I have some time on my hands I will devote it to icon-making because I'm a rather visual person, and I like messing with pictures and colours.

But one thing that I don't understand is the "Oh, I have icons! But if you use them, credit!"-thing going on. First of all, I have no idea from whom and where I've snatched all these things, and I find it a waste of my time and my computer's space to try to keep it in mind. Most things I use are scenes from serials or movies. Those scenes where thought up by a writer, visualized by cameraperson and directer, shot using actors and a team, then aired and screenshot by someone. And then someone comes along, downloads the picture, cuts out a chunk of it, calls it an icon and wants credit for an icon that is really a collaborative effort in which he or she just had the last (and I dare say) easiest part. If I'd want to credit I'd have to credit all the persons involved in creating the picture in the first place.

This might sound rather harsh, but I just had a look at a couple of icons that had an "Don't use as bases!" written underneath, and some of those icons just cried out for a bit of text. So what shall I do, search the picture, make the exact same cut again and put text into it, if I want to? I don't see the point. We are all doing this for fun, to deal a bit further with a fandom that we enjoy. I would see it differently if someone went out, took his or her own photos, uploaded them and made icons from them, because then the whole thing is actually his or her own work. There are also some extremely lovely icons about that were made with a lot of care and work. Credit where credit is due. So, to all the people creating icons out there: you're doing a wonderful job giving me a good laugh or making me squee looking at the icons you made.

Gosh, I should really go to bed, instead of ranting on and on.

Angels and Insects directed by Philip Haas

Angels and Insects is a 1995 adaptation of the novella Morpho Eugenia by A. S. Byatt starring Mark Rylance, Kristin Scott Thomas and Patsy Kensit. Because I've just read the book and we discussed it in class it is a bit difficult to not write about it as an adaptation of the novel. I can't judge how you would like the film if you had not read the book. As an adaptation it works pretty well though. There are no major changes in comparison to the novel, only two things were left out that I missed. The dialogues are mostly word for word as in the novel. So if you don't manage to read the book watching the film gives you a pretty good idea.

I pretty much liked the casting of the characters. I was a bit sceptical about Mark Rylance at first because I had imagined Adamson younger looking. Kristin Scott Thomas as Matty Crompton and Patsy Kensit as Eugenia were brilliant opposites of each other, Matty being rather skinny and darkhaired and very resolute, and Eugenia being blond and soft. The overall look of the film was nice but I had still imagined it more decadent, heavier and richer in colour. I found a lot of scenes too pale (I'm just talking about the colour here). The first scene already looked so much different in my mind from what I saw in the film. I'd have had the surroundings darker and the girls not in those horrible bright dresses but in something more pastel, making them more feminine and desirable and more like a mixture of butterflies and fairies whirling by, as William sees them for the first time. The filmmakers went for a direct copy of the bright butterfly colours but my sense for colours found that rather disturbing.

I won't talk too much about the story as I've already said that there is not that much plot, more ideas and notions and discussions of the clash of tradition and modernity. But I was rather surprised that I found the film not in the least as longish as I found the book when I read it. It's almost two hours but time went by pretty fast.

So, bearing in mind that it is always very hard to watch an adaptation if you have still the pictures of your own imagination in your mind, I say this was a pretty good one, very accurate to the tone and mood of the novel, if not always corresponding with the picture I had in mind.

7 out of 10 moths.

(This time it's moths because that scene completely freaked my out. Uhhhaaa, crawling flapping insects give me the creeps.)

Donnerstag, 1. November 2007

Now, that's what I call efficient.

About ... a year ago I noticed that the soap dispenser in the bathroom was almost empty. So I thought "Well, I gotta buy new soap. Just not today, because today I have other stuff to do." Months came and went and I squeezed the last bit of soap out of that dispenser. I kinda sucked it dry to it's last drop. Some weeks ago the poor thing finally gave up. So last Friday, when I was buying water at the drugstore, I remembered the poor soap dispenser on my washstand and went over to buy some soap. And I decided to buy some simple old-school piece of soap, no fluid soap in a dispenser. My old dispenser has to be remembered properly, I can't just replace it with a new one! So after five minutes of contemplation I chose a piece of soap (milk and honey), paid and went.

This piece of soap has been sitting on the table in my room until earlier today, when I managed to carry it the five metres to the bathroom and unpack it. What had kept me so long, you might ask, from taking it earlier to the bathroom? I don't have a soap dish. Never had one, and the ones in the shop where just ugly and/or too expensive. Maybe I manage to buy one in a year or so. I am afraid that will be one of those things where I'll always go "Oh no, not this month, I don't know how much money I have this month." I guess I'm just closefisted* there. Thank God I'm faster with buying shampoo or shower gel.


* Wow, how many words for German 'geizig' are there? Really hard to pick one here.